Broken – Away

Hailey was going away for a week with James and the kids. Then after a few days back they will go again. Our conversation was a little strained from the fallout of her cancelling and the subsequent conversation. I think she was more bothered by it than I was.


Broken is a story that is best read Chronologically to start from the beginning – Prologue

Hailey was going away for a week with James and the kids. Then after a few days back they will go again. Our conversation was a little strained from the fallout of her cancelling and the subsequent conversation. I think she was more bothered by it than I was.

Really I just wanted to know where I stood with her. It was a struggle for almost a year to that point. Probably even longer but she always told me she loved me and was in love with me until that time that she asked for space and slept with that guy.

Since that point “I love you’s” were far more inconsistent. I hadn’t heard it since the text fight. I tried to keep it peaceful. She was trying to make a point showing how busy she was.

Although I always knew her busy was self induced, due to her socializing with a bunch of different people. Which is fine but that is a hard way to come back into my life. We saw each other 6 or 7 times in 2 weeks, then once in the following week or so. I know better but gave her the benefit of the doubt that her life was a little challenging on her way out the door, again.

This would give me some time to date even beyond Ashley. May as well have some fun. It was strange I had 2 women but neither exclusively. So I went on a few dates and started to notice a pattern.

Hailey would start texting me on Friday or Saturday nights around 9:30-10. Was she trying to..? Wait I think she is trying to catch me on a date. She knows that if I don’t respond to her right away she will have an idea that I was on a date. This bothered me for many reasons.

Mostly that she could shut this down anytime she wanted. Just by committing to a future with me. Or giving me a small amount of time. I don’t like uncertainty. And the fact that she was upset for me dating, event though she would likely deny it, without giving me certainty. Pissed me off.

It had the opposite effect on me of the one I am sure she intended. I ignored it, answered when I got to it. And never addressed it. But I could even sense the attitude through it. Her goodnight’s were even a little cold. And sometimes she wouldn’t say goodnight unless it was Friday or Saturday night.

But I knew she also couldn’t say anything. She had dated when I was at home trying to get to her. And I am sure this drove her crazy. It is never easy to taste your own medicine. But boy did she earn it.

Author: Matt

Hi, I’m Matt. Just your average uneventful guy. Dedicated Dad, emapth, and nurturer. Going through something I couldn’t possible ever thought possible. My story is called Broken. About an affair at the end of a long marriage and how ultimately I experienced the worst heartbreak of my life. It's honest, raw, and a little bit entertaining. I hope to share my story so people can learn while being therapeutic for myself.

11 thoughts on “Broken – Away”

  1. I am trying to understand why she continued to take vacations with James if she was actually trying to leave him. She did that the first time around too. I mean, I get it if you already have something scheduled…as to not disappoint the kids, but it feels like she and James are just continuing to go about their lives, and not actually talking about splitting up. At this point, did you get a true sense that she was “on the way out” of her marriage….?

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I never understood them. They seem to be able to be around each other while hating each other. It was bizarre. Yes she had started to talk to him about it. But hadn’t specified a time. She said she was trying to not push like she had the previous time.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. How frustrating. I don’t understand the vacation thing either. But maybe that’s in line with how they think new houses give them a different perspective? Like an escape from reality. Figuratively and literally. Either way it’s a head scratcher. (Also that’s a pic of GCT… were they going to NYC?)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It was hard to understand but she really hadn’t unveiled her full plan. She hinted probably similar to what she does with everything. Nothing is ever straight forward. At this point he was still buying her lingerie for the trip. Also I think that is part him. He is not reading the room so to speak. They were traveling by train, GCT has a much better visual than the train station they were leaving from. lol.

      Like

      1. Wow he really was buying her lingerie for this trip? He either wasn’t reading the room like you said, which makes him clueless perhaps. Or he was reading it yet choosing to ignore it, which makes him kind of a prick. OR she really was confusing him and giving him no idea what was up as much as she was confusing you, which makes her a prick too.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Matt, it almost appear like the thrill of the chase, in both directions, is what fueled her before. This just popped into my head so I’m saying it – when it was new and both of you were still married, there was this whole illicit thing that was going on. Nothing you did was ordinary/routine…it was exciting, spark-y, new, fun, and taboo…

    Maybe, deep down, she is afraid to commit to you simply because the commitments she has with other people, James and her previous husband, haven’t worked out. What if she’s really afraid that the fire you both felt/still feel will burn out once you are exclusive and committed?

    Just a thought…

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I think she was afraid of a lot. Honestly I thought alot about the taboo thing. And I don’t have an answer really. I think she likes excitement but that’s not what she told me so many times. She wanted peace and she wanted it with me. I was grounding for her. So which is it? Lol!! I think you are totally onto something here though in terms of her fear. I think she is just afraid of me in general. Not my opinion but a friend said “she knows you are to good for her and it scares the shit out of her.”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Her texting you at that time on a Friday or Saturday night is straight up shady. I’m glad you took your time to respond. She never did care how her dating while you were married affected you, it does sound like she got a taste of her own medicine, hopefully she learns from this and doesn’t do it again

    Liked by 1 person

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